The Case of the Missing Remote: A Mystery

Some time ago in a far off land.

Okay.
Last night.
In the livingroom.

Remote in hand, I settled into my spot on the couch.
Yes, my spot.
Don't judge.
You have one too.

Everything was fine.
The remote rested on the cushion beside me.
Safe.
Secure.
Accounted for.
Or so I thought.

The show ended.
I reached for the remote to change the channel.
Nothing.
Gone.
Vanished.
The cushion was empty.

Now, this raised several questions.
Where did it go?
How did it get there?
Who took it?
And perhaps most importantly, why?

The seat beside me had been empty the entire time.
No one sat there.
No one walked by.
No dogs approached.

The investigation began.
I searched between the couch cushions.
Under the pillows.
Under the couch.
In the dog blankets.
Around the dog beds.
In the kitchen.
Out of desperation, I checked in the refrigerator.

I would like the record to show I had not left the couch
at any point before the remote disappeared.

Still,
I checked.
No remote.

The search continued.
Hours passed.
Okay.
Maybe five minutes.
But emotionally,
hours.

Defeated,
I returned to the couch.
And there it was.
Sitting calmly on the cushion beside me.
Exactly where I had left it.
As if it had been there the entire time.

The case remains unsolved.
The suspect list currently includes:
the couch,
the dogs,
interdimensional travel,
and the remote itself.

Denise Govan Books